Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Background Checks

previous post: That Type!

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64 Comments

  1. ben there, done that, got first

  2. Hmmm. Hope they’re not cheaping out and leaving the baby out when they’re passing that bong. Facepalm…

  3. Sweet! Horsey Porn.

  4. dead end..lolz

  5. I don’t understand why gay dudes marry wemen.

    I think that guy behind the baby is lighting a bong.

    That lady’s daughter looks like a weird mini person. That’s my Uncle Phil in the background. He’s always got his hands down his pants. He doesn’t even have a penis. Fishing accident.

    That lady’s a horsepervert. She obviously wants to be in the picture.

  6. krasivaya_devushka

    lol @ Walter!

  7. lol! Yup, the first one about sums it up!

    I need a better angle of the horses.

  8. Ok so not to be the whole ‘wet blanket’ thing but those parents could lose that child in the second one. There are laws about the use of drugs around children and I’d file it under more than just ‘lame’.

    Anyway, the way that dude is holding onto the dress in the first one looks like he’s taking preventative measures to stop her doing the bolt….

  9. love the pic of the three horses..jk… I’m being an asshole

  10. I do hope that the movie they were watching was age appropriate, you know, for the baby.

  11. what’s so bad with the first one? he’s grabbing her dress?

  12. STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVER

  13. Its the DEAD END sign behind them….

  14. Not be be a downer, but ones like the 2nd one make me so sick. My stepmom tried for years and years to get pregnant and couldn’t while these idiot tweens and stoner pos’s have their babies just right there with all their drugs and crap. UGH.

  15. aside from unintentional symbolism, how is that at all lame?

  16. @Stever, you are late dude. Now go and sulk on it.
    @haandvine, do you see the road sign up there in the first pic. That sums up the lameness of the first pic.

  17. everything’s boring today. this is a boring day.

  18. Alyssa’s is hot… I too would have my hands in my pants if I was there.

  19. she looks exactly like a friend of mine, piercing, glasses and all.

    cledus back there, i don’t know him.

  20. I agree with Walter that the lady’s daughter in the hands-down-pants pic looks like a weird mini person. Part of it is her teeth. They don’t look like healthy children’s teeth at all, they look more like popcorn kernels.

  21. I’d say “dead end” is dead on, neither one of them looks very interested, like they stroll down the street in their wedding garb all the time…. also Billy looks quite in touch with his “feminine side..

  22. It’s the little girls hair, she looks like a midget Goldie Hawn

  23. The hillbilly only has his hands in his dangeree pockets. Why was that posted? Lame admin

  24. First one reminds me of a friend who had a band play “The Great Divide” at his wedding. The second one is really appalling. Those poor pink little lungs.

  25. Shit post.

    You dipshits can suck my wrinkly cock.

  26. At least if someone sees number 2 who knows the people they can report it to somebody.

    Eh.

  27. i hope that was their first priority and not submitting to lamebook.

  28. I enjoyed the simplicity of the first one. The pose of the couple just makes it so much better.

    Horse porn FTW. I can admit to have never seen a horse fuck a horse until now. I have on the other hand seen a horse fuck a woman. Take that as you will.

  29. @throwingtofu

    Your ‘popcorn kernels’ comment made me spit my drink all over the screen.

  30. Hey there Lamebook. Finally made me register.

  31. #1 Maybe “Dead End” is prescient sign of things to come?

  32. hobo, i recently set up a myspace so i can keep tabs on birdy stuff, and i keep getting these random adds.

    one was from an american guy with gangster baseball cap and liberal sprinkle of dollar signs in his name. in his interests, it said ‘skittles’. his status said something along the lines of ‘blue viagras, green lucky charms, orange mercedes, pink super stars – anyone interested hit me up yo.’ then, just to confirm my train of thought, i noticed the whole of his page background was of pills.

    i was wondering how you’d go about reporting something like that… then i just cast my mind back a couple of years to times when i was running down an up escalator at a tube station to avoid police dogs, to roller-blading back from a party at 8am (rush-hour) down the middle of oxford street, to being a shivering, gurning mess in some girl i was fairly sure was really a guy ‘s bed….

    basically what i’m trying to say, is there’s probably not a parent out there who hasn’t passed their 6 month old a dutch at some time or another.

  33. krasivaya_devushka

    That is the longest comment I’ve seen on Lamebook in a while.

  34. @alordslums: Yes, but a good parent knows where the camera is.

  35. i went to a birthday shindig a few weeks back with and did quite a few shots my friends brother and his baby mama, and there may or may not have been some other things going on. it struck me as crazy that they were parents of an 8-month-old and going balls out like that, but on second thought I realized they are 26 and entitled to some fun.

    Of course, the major difference between them and the dirtbags in #2 is that their baby was tucked safely in a crib many miles away with her (not drunk or high) grandparents; not balaced precariously on a someone’s lap in a haze of smoke with bong water dripping on her.

  36. @33 – krasi, it has to be a long worm to get little fargises to bite. :-)

    @34 – lol

  37. did a few shots with, i mean

  38. Nice parenting skills, Stephanie. Who’s that knocking on the door? Oh shit, it’s CPS! Hide the bong!
    P.S. *hi dollhouse girls!*

  39. Lmao @ little fargises! Alord, you are a riot.

  40. 1. Is true.

    2. I bet that’s porn on the TV.

    3. Did the BTK strangler get released?

    4. Did she get the money shot?

    5. Body clock still out of whack after a month of football. It’s a God-awful hour right now.

  41. There’s not one funny or lame thing about that second picture. Unless you think it’s funny that the poor kid pictured doesn’t stand a chance in hell of having a decent life. That baby will end up being a piece of trash just like its parents. Tragic.

  42. The first one is there because of the obvious boner. Not because he’s holding her dress – duh.

  43. SHAKE THAT BEAR

  44. @ratcoonlover, you’d be surprised where that falls on this list of priorities. I work for a national agency that works closely with the ACF and DHS/DHHS. Drug use is obviously bad, but until it’s clear that it is negatively impacting the child’s life in a more direct and clear way, there is little that they will do.

  45. dirtylittlepretty

    horsepervert. haha.

  46. @volupian

    No, it’s because the sign in the background says “Dead End,” which is what some people consider a marriage to be.

  47. What doesn’t make sense is that no one would bat an eye if someone was smoking cigarettes or some other tobacco product around an infant. But, cannabis, dear Christ that child is DOOMED. All smoke inhalation is bad for anyone, children especially. Don’t bitch about people having marijuana around a child (which probably occurs rarely) when a lot of parents smoke cigarettes inside while living with children all the time. Issues of legality don’t make either correct or one somehow better than the other.
    So long as someone is sober and responsible for the baby, it’s really not bad.
    #3: I don’t understand, his hands are obviously in the bib portion, not his crotch area. Is it the hillbilly aspect or how her necklace rather resembles a schlong?

  48. Girl in 2nd pic looks hot. Totally understand the guy in the background silently jackin’ off…

    Ben.

  49. I thought that the first one was there because of the “Dead End” sign. A terrible Lamebook submission, not even worth a groan on the “Dad Joke Radar”.

  50. i think they meant it to be that dead end sign, but i submit that billy’s boner might be more comical. thank you.

  51. the “dead end” one is scraping the barrel on lamebook’s part.

    eh, i’ve offered my two cents. it’s not lame, in the least.

  52. I agree, suesse, especially after tonya’s comment. Doesn’t stand a chance in hell of having a decent life? Christ, DARE got to you good.

    And for all we know, they ARE smoking tobacco. While it’s not cool to smoke anything around a child, it’s not the end of the fucking world if it’s marijuana.

  53. PraetorianXVIII

    Thank God Doctor F*cking Chiiro is on the job.

  54. The first and last were really funny. The third, meh, seen enough rednecks in overalls to find it meh.

    The second one, what’s the problem? OMG they’re poking smot AND have a baby?!?!?! They’re obviously gonna sell it to support their addiction!

  55. No, the problem is that they’re smoking in the same room as an infant.

  56. really?the baby is doomed because it’s parents are smoking pot…hahaha i don’t think people realize who smokes pot,it’s not just hippies or drug addicts or terrible,disgusting,pieces of trash…it’s also teachers,lawyers,doctors even,soccer moms,fucking everybody smokes pot(alright not everybody,i mean every type of person..).so,that kid might be just fine,and he isn’t getting cancer from being around weed smoke or even getting a contact high,i agree his little lungs don’t need to be around a bunch of smoke..shit i was going to write more but i’m already over it…

  57. anyone get it? BEN there, done that, got FIRST? it wasn’t a typo….

  58. carelessdreaming

    are you people really defending smoking pot around a baby? wtf. maybe if they went in another part of the house, an made damn sure some responsible person was watching the baby, fine. i have no problem with people getting high or smoking cigarettes, just keep the shit away from your kids. jesus.

  59. Thank God Dr Fucking Censor is on the job.

    I wasn’t defending anything, just commenting that the world is not going to cave in and that child isn’t doomed to a life of selling their body on the street if the parents are smoking weed.

  60. i’m not really defending it either,pretty much just saying the same thing;the kid’s life isn’t over because someone is smoking pot around him.people treat weed like meth or something,and it’s not,it’s not even anywhere near the equivalent of tobacco.

  61. @Toodles
    I know how your stepmom feels. Been going on 8 years of trying, and seeing stuff like this just breaks my heart. There is no justice.

  62. dirtylittlepretty

    i smoke…but i still think its a stupid ass idea to do it in front of a kid…hmm..lets see how the baby acts when he gets a contact high!! dumbshits!

  63. the guy in the wedding has a huge boner DUHHHHHHHH

  64. crazydiamond727

    It’s like gazing into a crystal ball of my ex-boyfriend’s future…

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