Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Another WINSday! (part 1)

previous post: My Mom’s on Facebook

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76 Comments

  1. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Ben.

  2. Blaire was a few grammar/spelling mistakes from being epic win. Her message is a good one though, so she deserves credit for that.

  3. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    I simply cannot wait to see what the now infamous malteaser has to say about this… Place your bets.

  4. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    @DivineMonkeyTrigger I bet 300 on “oll”

  5. 2 seconds ago… Blaire must have submitted that himself, which makes it much less of a win.

  6. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    K Dukey smooth your on. I was being sarcastic but now you better realise this is legally binding. $300 US… I’ll give you my paypal details yo, daddy needs some new shoes! :-)

  7. Thanks for sending that last one in Blair, you rock.

    No.

  8. Blaire*

  9. I don’t know, jools, can you report your own post?

  10. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    There is no way anyone else but Blaire could’ve submitted it. And at two seconds that’s record time for a screenshot, pompous twat was real stoked with that apparently.

  11. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    They should have waited till someone told Blaire to prove him/herself as someone who can accurately portray the correct spelling of Apostrophe

  12. Zach made me smile.

  13. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    … and BTW Happy St. Patrick’s day. Who else is having beer for breakfast right now?

  14. Blaire’s a bitch. One for trying to be all hilarious over a couple of mistakes and looking like a twat, two for making spelling mistakes when being an arrogant fuckhead about a few typos and three for writing it solely to take a screenshot, submit it here and feel like some awesome internet crusader.

    And the best bit? Since she submitted this, Blaire’s definitely here reading this.. And Blaire? Fuck you.

    Save your crazy rants for someone who’s actually done something fucking stupid (like you) rather than made a couple of mistakes. And try not to make it so obvious when you submit your own stuff.

  15. Dolores is a bit touchy, too…

  16. “tattoo’s and piercing’s” doesn’t suggest that the tattoos and piercings “belong to something”, it means that something else belongs to them.

    Geez, Blaire. You’re really letting down your demographic.

  17. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    Hobo has the claws out… You’re right she’s probably reading, and probably about to respond.
    Is Blaire a girls name? News to me…

  18. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    *shit, if Blaire is reading I could be in trouble- girl’s name*

  19. I’m rather surprised Blaire submitted that. I assumed somebody else submitted it to point out what a douchebag both pierced and inked parties were. Apostrophe is spelled “apostrophe,” not “apostraphe.” And as Snip already pointed out, the apostrophes indicate that something belongs to the tattoos and piercings. Furthermore, “workplace” would be more correct than “work place.”

    No worries, Blaire. Your attempt was valiant and appreciated. and a copy of Eats, Shoots, & Leaves will straighten you right out. Send it to the group you commented on afterward — maybe they will learn something, too.

    I don’t even have a college education, and I know this shit. Plus, I’m a bird.

    To the rest of you: Fuck yeah, Blaire’s a girl’s name. Don’t you remember The Facts of Life?

    (To Blaire: What I did with the apostrophe in your name in the paragraph above actually is called a contraction, and it combines the words “Blaire is” into one word. Do not confuse this with the possessive form of “Blaire’s.”)

  20. lol

  21. Eats, Shoots & Leaves is a great book.

  22. Maybe I need remedial english lessons, but I thought the possessive on the apostrophes, indicating that something belongs to them, only occurs when the apostrophes are at the end of the word, like: tattoos’

    Oh, and Samantha, Alt + F4 is more applicable than Ctrl + Alt + Delete

  23. Demmit malteaser I was about to bet $301 on lol. I swear I was.
    On another note, I wonder if Blaire manages to have any friends. I don’t think I’d be her friend. On a plus she managed to do that little speech without the caps lock key. Did I get this all right, TurkeyVulture? I don’t want Blaire on my case, too.

  24. @chicky_monkey

    You do, in fact, need remedial English lol. The possessive can be ‘s or s’ and ‘s is more common. The reason it is sometimes s’ is because the word already ends in S such as “Charles’ car”.

  25. @chicky – that would mean something belongs to a group of tattoos e.g. “my tattoos’ ink is fading” (as in, on ALL of my tattoos), as opposed to “my tattoo’s ink is fading” which would mean the ink on just one tattoo is fading.

    God I’m dull.

    Zach rocks. Regicide is a very underused word in my opinion.

  26. Everybody should have a grandmother named Delores.

  27. Ok, I haven’t had an English class in over 20 years, so please excuse me.

  28. not.ben: Don’t be so hasty! For all you know, she could have pressed the caps lock key before all of those capital letters, and then pressed it again afterwards to continue writing in lower case.

  29. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    @Chicky dont worry, your knowledge of keyboard shortcuts out weighs you deficiency in english. But you have to remember that from Ctrl + Alt + Delete you can get to task manager and ALSO “quit it”

  30. Although I am anal about correct grammar and spelling I found Blaire’s message to be condescending and arrogant.

  31. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    Pay up Dukey!!!

  32. Excuse me ‘kiwigurl4life’, but if you were truly ‘anal’ about grammar you probably would have noticed he fucked it up and switched who possesses whom.

  33. I see no problem (usually) with being condescending and arrogant towards illiterates. Language does have standards. Unfortunately, these days most people, including those in the education system, are lost on that fact.

  34. Blaire didn’t send that in, you can’t report your own comment.

  35. ^^anlg…yes you can..and im sure he did. DURR.

  36. All spelling etc aside, Blaire has clearly submitted their own post as the option to “Remove” is available

  37. Grandparents on facebook is wrong.

  38. Come on Blaire… I deserve a bollocking for my comment, right? Pleaaaaase?

  39. I’m trying… but I really can’t take a comment seriously by someone named shitfuckdick. But I appreciate the feedback all the same

  40. @kiwigurl4life Coming from someone who seems to think ‘girl’ is spelled ‘gurl’ that’s rather hypocritical.

  41. JesusOnADinosaur

    Yeah, what BritishHobo said.

  42. I just assumed Shitfuckdick was French. In my head I pronounce it “Sheefuhdee”. I picture him as a cultured man, who only enjoys the finer things in life.

  43. hehehe i love the comments more than the posts… anyone with me?

  44. With an creature from the animal kingdom who enjoys playing with their turd?…No, Monkey.

  45. @soup i’m sure he is a modern gentleman sitting up in his chateau sipping tea while he gets his daily laugh from lamebook. nothing but the best for Sheefuhdee.

  46. Wow I like how Blaire’s all snarky but doesn’t even know what HE/she is talking about either! “Using an apostraphe [sic] indicates that they belong to something [no; it would indicate that they OWN something!], but I believe you are attempting to use tattoos and piercings as possessives [*possessions], which they are not. [actually, if they have apostrophes, they are! even though that is not what was intended]”

    The whole comment made no sense really… So the person said “job” instead of “work,” big deal. I’m picky about grammar too but Blaire has completely missed the number one rule in ripping on other people’s grammar, which is that you need to use grammar properly yourself when doing so! FAIL.

  47. JesusOnADinosaur, that Blaire’s a bitch, or that I need a bollocking? :P

  48. JesusOnADinosaur

    Both. The bollocking would be hilarious to read!

  49. Sam, that’s not what Heath Ledger’s character said to Jake Gyllenhaal’s in Brokeback mountain.
    Actually I think he said something more along the lines of Travis’s post.
    Get’s a little cramped in those tents, and one can easily misfire.

  50. By the way people, there was a “classic” lamebook post on facebook yesterday, I saw it on my feed.
    And the malteaser made a comment, and it wasn’t only a lol.
    Nothing too earth shattering, but an extra word.
    Refer if you care.

  51. wordpervert: I didn’t see that :O What was it?

  52. Hobo, lamebook classic “welcome home”

  53. I knew there was something wrong with how Blaire spelt ‘apostrophe’, thanks guys ;)

    And as for ‘Blair’ spelt with an ‘e’? I don’t like it.

  54. kiwigurl4life – if you are anal about correct grammar, you would have put a comma between “spelling” and “I”… :)

  55. @50 wordpervert
    I saw that! malteaser said “lol ouch” :)

    The Blaire rant bored me to almost tears. Why are you all talking to much about it?? (Yes, I know how to use an ‘, like @25 Gingivitis said)

  56. also, you can report your own posts, while on a fan page or something of that sort. I think.
    “bollocking” lol.

  57. Regicide, that one made me laugh. That Danny guy clearly hasn’t even the foggiest idea that it’s a threat.

  58. D-moneys?

  59. I’m SO glad Snip said something about the whole apostrophe thing. It’s sad that it took 16 posts to get there, though.

  60. So glad D-Money’s getting his dues off of his tiny Facebook group. He’s been asking for a Lamebook entry forever.

  61. OK, Blaire is completely irritating me because she’s trying so hard to be a grammar/spelling Nazi and has completely failed. First off, as most of you have pointed out, she misspelled “apostrophe.” Then she goes on to criticize him by saying that he is “attempting to use tattoos and piercings as possessives.” Um…I believe he was attempting to pluralize them, not use them as possessives. There are several elements at play here that people continually screw up in everyday language: plural forms of words, contractions, and possessives. Apostrophes are for contractions and possessives, and apostrophes never, ever make a word plural. Case in point: I constantly see abbreviated eras/decades written as “the 70′s, the 80′s,” etc. STOP IT! It’s ’70s and ’80s. The apostrophe is a contraction to shorten 1970s and 1980s, and the s does not need an apostrophe because you are pluralizing the years. I even witnessed captions on the Dr. Oz show today that read, “The Do’s and Don’ts of ______.” OK, so the logic is that you need an apostrophe to pluralize “Do’s,” but not for “Don’ts”!? Gah!!! Those are two very different usages of apostrophes, and I still can’t seem to figure out why people INSIST on randomly inserting apostrophes to pluralize words.

    Sorry for the rant, but this is one of my most irritating pet peeves.

  62. @mercury125

    *possessive’s
    *word’s
    *contraction’s
    *possessive’s
    *apostrophe’s
    *contraction’s
    *possessive’s
    *apostrophe’s
    *era’s
    *decade’s
    *’70′s
    *’80′s
    *1970′s
    *1980′s
    *year’s
    *caption’s
    *Don’t's
    *Don’t's
    *usage’s
    *apostrophe’s
    *people’
    *apostrophe’s
    *word’s
    *peeve’s

    Either you’re laughing right now, or your head has melted into a puddle of jelly on your keyboard. Either way, glad I could help.

  63. lol!! mercury125 you’re funny … ‘cos actually apostrophes CAN be used for making a word plural if it ends with an “s” or a “z” already.

    Example: Doris’s desk is by the window.

    Example: Jose Sanchez’s father is 53 years old.

    AND “The Do’s and Don’ts of ____.” is CORRECT. Because apostrophese are used to make sure the word being said is still clear even when plural. If it didnt have the apostrophe, it would be Dos, and that could be confusing.

    Example: Dot your i’s and cross your t’s.

  64. ^^ was @mercury125

  65. @hobbsste Not plural… there’s still only one Doris and one Jose Sanchez.

  66. That’s funny, @hobbsste, because you’re completely and utterly wrong. Your first examples are expressing POSSESSION, not plurality. And again, your next example is wrong, too. It is indeed “Dos and Don’ts,” unless you’re discussing something that belongs to do (and I doubt such a situation exists). “Don’t” only has an apostrophe because it is a contraction of “do not.” AND, if you really thought that you could pluralize “do” as “Do’s,” then wouldn’t you also write “Don’t's”?? I smell inconsistencies!

    As for your last statement, confusion is avoided by capitalizing I and T. “Dot your Is and cross your Ts.” You can potentially use an apostrophe to avoid confusion, but grammar experts categorize this as a small gray area in grammar, and even so, the apostrophes aren’t necessary or 100% adherent to grammar rules.

    May I suggest remedial English lessons for you?

    @Stretch

    It burns!!!

  67. Blaire sounds like the life of the party…

  68. JesusOnADinosaur

    Who cares about apostrophes, Blaire’s still a bitch.

  69. Yup, Blaire is a bitch. You don’t need to have perfect grammar in order to be functioning member of society and you don’t deserve to be disrespected if you don’t, you arrogant twat.

  70. @mercury125

    Actually, when you’re pluralizing letters like I, it’s better to put in an apostrophe so people aren’t confused. It looks like you’re writing the word is, even if you capitalize it. It’s the same thing with the letter a. Alternatively, you could surround the letter in quotation marks and then add the s.

  71. To people correcting grammar: NOBODY CARES!!! Also, if you’re going to try to sound like Mr/Ms Smart please ensure your own grammar is correct, i.e. no dangling prepositions!!! Sentences are not supposed to end in words like it, of, do, at, etc…

  72. @snwbrdbchlr – It is an article, not a preposition. Do is a verb, not a preposition. So if you’re correcting people who are correcting people, make sure YOU’RE right.

  73. *actionashton – “It” is a pronoun, not an article. So, if you’re correcting people who are correcting people who are correcting people, make sure YOU’RE right, dumbass.

  74. Thanks mercury125, I try to learn somethink everyday…

    @stretch: You wrote “don’t's” twice. Twice a horrible shiver was sent up my spine.

  75. Blaire’s post is weird. I thought that “tattoo’s” would imply that the tattoo is the owner of something and not that something was the owner of the tattoos.

    You don’t say, “Eric tattoo’s is weird.”
    You would say, “Eric’s tattoo is weird.”

    Does anyone agree?

    You can also use “tattoo’s” for “tattoo is”…possibly.

    Someone has probably said all of this and my grammar has probably not been perfect either. I am just confused and wanted to know if anyone sees what I see.

  76. “Oh no! My new tattoo’s lost all its ink already!”
    “Dang, that tattoo’s really stupid.”
    Yep, “is” and “has” are the only options there, and they’re kinda a stretch.

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